My Sleeping with Bread refused to be deep and thoughtful this week. I actually wrote it Monday afternoon at the cafe but between obsessing over my baby and being overwhelmed by the blogosphere ... well here we are ... again ... Wednesday.

Blessings:

• Hints of Spring


• More birds


• Little gray squirrels


• Deer visitations


• New Friends


• The New Computer arrived safe and sound! Happy Dance!

Missing:

• Dogwood Trails


• Bluebonnet Trails


• Dallas Blooms


• Ok All Texas Wildflowers!


• Thunderstorms -- real ones that last hours
  


• Hail Storms (some poor NYer traveling through Texas)


• I'm giving tornadoes just a passing mention


• Let's not forget Main Street Ft. Worth Arts Festival (which was completely obliterated one year by a sudden combo of the three items above)


• And then there's Family

I started down that slippery slope of homesickness when I was reading my National Geographic Adventure Magazine and noticed an advertisement for TravelTex.com. They proudly proclaim:

Who am I to argue? So I checked them out. It's a fairly decent site actually. The screen saver download was disappointing since they don't use images that are actually large enough for my monitor.

But! I found out that I can control a camera in Texas from New York. It's rather fun. But be patient with it. The camera really does receive every request you make. Every left and right and every zoom. Alright, if you want to play with the camera, click to get in line. Literally. You're looking for a button that says "Get in Line."

Oh and you should also know that by mid-May, I know I'd be ready to come back to my "Southern Fringes of Upstate NY!" Or maybe somewhere even cooler. So obviously I just have a small case of Texas Spring Fever.

The Sleeping with Bread meme is propagated by Mary of Life, the Universe and Everything. It gives us a chance to stop and consider God's blessings and a chance to evaluate what is giving us pause or grief.

It is an easy thing to imagine God as critical, as judging, as a director of our ways ... the one who is always herding us about trying to get us to do what is right. Basically it is easy to imagine Him as always frustrated with us. But do you ever think of God as feeling pleased by what we independently hope and plan in our hearts?

I nearly missed out on the blessing of being reminded about God's joy in our creativity.

If I had been bluntly asked, "Do you think that we are created with free will ... completely free will?" I would have said, "Yes, absolutely." If I had been asked, "Do you think our free will makes us capable of devising wicked plans in our hearts ... without prompting from any evil source (ie Satan or friends without morals or etc)?" I would have said, "Yes, each of us is capable of creating sinful ideas without any additional help from another source -- spirit or flesh." And if I had been asked, "Do you think our free will makes us capable of creating plans for the good of others without any additional influence from another source (ie God or friends who also want good)?" Again, I would have said, "Yes. Absolutely."

I believe our free will gives us the ability to generate original evil and create original good. Independently. We do not require assistance -- although we seem to create in synergistic ways with assistance. Further, I believe it is our independent free will that gives us the ability to choose to invite God's spirit in to our lives or to hang out with Satan and his buds.

So how is it that since I believe I can create independent plans that can grieve God -- How is it that I would never consider that God could be happy with plans I create? Moreover, could plans I create inspire God to join in the creativity with His own ideas and inspirations?

When I read about David and the temple in Samuel, I thought something like, "Oh well. Too bad for David." I read that God was pleased. I read that God told David, "Great idea! You won't get to do it because you're a warrior. But, I'll let one of your sons do it. And as a bonus I'll establish your kingdom forever." I read that David was pleased with the deal.

But when I encountered the story again in Chronicles, I was blown away. When I started reading the encounter again, I saw David so in awe of God's good gifts. I did not see any disappointment. And in Chronicles I got to understand all of the prep work David did ... all the collections ... all the prefabricated parts that were being put together. David divided up the Levities into their appropriate assignments -- both present and future. And then David pulls together all the leaders that will still be in place when Solomon takes the thrown and he commits them to the project ... them AND their possessions / gifts.

And then David turns to Solomon and blesses him and hands over to him the plans for the temple.

9 "And you, my son Solomon, acknowledge the God of your father, and serve him with wholehearted devotion and with a willing mind, for the LORD searches every heart and understands every motive behind the thoughts. If you seek him, he will be found by you; but if you forsake him, he will reject you forever. 10 Consider now, for the LORD has chosen you to build a temple as a sanctuary. Be strong and do the work."

11 Then David gave his son Solomon the plans for the portico of the temple, its buildings, its storerooms, its upper parts, its inner rooms and the place of atonement.

12 He gave him the plans of all that the Spirit had put in his mind for the courts of the temple of the LORD and all the surrounding rooms, for the treasuries of the temple of God and for the treasuries for the dedicated things.

[ ... the list gets long and even includes the design of the forks and bowls ..]

18 and the weight of the refined gold for the altar of incense. He also gave him the plan for the chariot, that is, the cherubim of gold that spread their wings and shelter the ark of the covenant of the LORD.

19 "All this," David said, "I have in writing from the hand of the LORD upon me, and he gave me understanding in all the details of the plan." I Chronicles 28

Ok this is just the most exciting thing to me. David came up with the idea. David got to go out and war and conquer and bring about peace AND he got to collect an amazing tonnage of gold, silver, bronze, precious stones ... etc etc etc ... AND he got to create the plans in his journals. When David sat down to write, God would reveal to him temple plans.

Alright this is very imaginative but I can just see David writing "Today I went out and conquered and those people had more bronze than I've seen in a long time ..." and God would whisper "Yeah and here's what can happen with that bronze." And David's eyes would light up and he'd write for maybe a few minutes or a few hours. Then he'd get out "The Temple Plan" book and carefully rewrite his notes.

As far as I'm concerned God let David do all the fun creative stuff a body could handle. Then poor Solomon had to carry out the plans -- I'm fairly sure he had some fun himself though. Ok, it's really pretty obvious Solomon still got to have some of the planning fun. But there's nothing like being the creator of the plan -- the one who first catches the vision.

But let me just repeat myself one more time ... Why does it Not routinely occur to me that God can get excited about my ideas and want to co-create?

So this brings me to a second blessing:

Have you ever read a classic novel or Shakespearean play and thought "Oh that was so much more enjoyable than when I was in school." Why is that? Simple. It's much more enjoyable because someone isn't making you stop and discuss every bit of it and skip over portions. No one is interrupting your thoughts. No one is making you record analogies and threads and analyze the book until the story is so disrupted and dissected as to be shredded and unenjoyable. And yet you know good and well that all of the training you received then helped you enjoy the book now.

That is exactly the way this adventure is turning out for me. Reading the Bible in large clumps is giving me such a feeling for the story. It gets exciting like all really great stories do.

A bit of disconcerting ...

The story is written by many people at different times. Reading each book of the Bible independently is like reading a collection of books from a time period. Parts are repeated and clarified in each book but sometimes it feels out of sync.

Sooo, you know ... without me actually voicing these thoughts ... my mother mailed to me the plan she is using to read the Bible over a year's time. And it's a chronological plan! I'd never even thought to look for one.

Sooo I started looking around online to find one like it that I could point you to and I found one at Back to the Bible (Yeah. Imagine that. They're still around -- and looking very modern. Oh but a hint: to actually move through the months you have to click the blue arrow beside the month.)

Anyway, it's kind of late to try to implement Back to the Bible's chronological reading plan for the Old Testament but I think I'll use it for the New Testament -- especially since it very tightly meshes the Gospels together.

I believe I should be through reading in June or July -- for the first read through. I'm already looking forward to the next one.

The Sleeping with Bread meme is propagated by Mary of Life, the Universe and Everything. It gives us a chance to stop and consider God's blessings and a chance to evaluate what is giving us pause or grief.

There are times when we enter into projects with God ... expecting one outcome ... but He has His own ways. I'm going to tell you about some things that have happened to me because I've set out on this Bible Reading adventure. These things have come to me and, if they had happened apart from this adventure, they would have been seen as gifts, as good things ... but it would have been like the difference between something practical vs something lavish -- something lavish that is wished for when only the practical is expected.

First came a very long explanation ...

My January book for TBR Challenge was to be told ... by Dan Allender. I've skimmed over bits and pieces of his book before but this time the objective was a cover to cover reading. It got difficult because Dan's writing always shakes me up. I had to stop four chapters from the ending. I read another book completely and then started yet another book. Eventually, this last weekend, I finished to be told....

I've read it. More. I've felt it. I've imagined it. I've loved it. I've cried over it, too. Again.

Imagine this: You meet up with a friend and your friend starts telling you something he's been pondering and thinking through. You find yourself nodding your head following his every thought because you've been wondering about similar things and reading similar books.

Then, it happens, your friend leans forward and says, "And about this topic, here. I've been thinking. It's like this ..." And suddenly you're swept away by his observations because the topic is the very topic that has been causing you to pause and wonder.

When the conversation started out, you never expected your friend to walk right up to your "Pondering Point" and lay out a fresh new angle of understanding. His angle might be a point-of-view that's just a few degrees different from where you've been standing and looking over that "Pondering Point" BUT just that little shift ... and poof! -- your understanding is enlarged and stirred-up ... ... ... and yet that does not mean that either of you can fully grasp the meaning.

When that sort of moment happens, you find yourself staring at your friend, your mouth hanging open but not a single syllable can escape you. You're both left standing there looking out over "Pondering Point" in complete and total awe.

~ ~ ~

You know I've been pondering over and over how it is that Moses and God constantly negotiated.

God would say, "That's it! Move outta the way! I'm tak'n 'em down!"

And then Moses would say, "But you've promised, and you know what the neighbors would say."

Then God would relent but also cook up some punishment that made everybody regret that He didn't just kill 'em and get it all over with.

So, the Israelites would say, "We swear you're our one and only and we'll never look at another god for as long as we live."

And God would believe them! And then, fairly often, he'd even take back His punishment or reduce it or shift it.

~ ~ ~

Do you know what Dan Allender calls all of that? He calls it haggling. He says in our culture we don't get that the whole process is an honorable, win/win battle of wits. And then Dan marches right over to the thing that was bothering me last week. Samuel told Saul that God isn't man so He doesn't change His mind. And Dan continued on to point out that God says "I AM who I AM" (no Popeye did not coin the phrase) and that God claims to be the same yesterday, today, and forever ... so ...

Dan's idea is that evidently God has an ability that man does not entirely possess: God can change His actions without changing Who He is ... nor does it change His plans.

I think Dan's on to something. We've all made a few changes in our actions from time to time that do not change who we are. And we can make simple variations in our plans and not be kept from reaching a short-term goal. But it is impossible for us, as humans, to constantly change our actions without becoming a different type of person. And it is impossible for us to make changes, over and over, to a plan and reach our original, unmodified goal.

But here's the thing, when we haggle with God in prayer, God may be considering variations ... BUT ... we have to make a change ... a real change. Why? Because our hearts are transparent before God -- our true objectives are absolutely exposed to him. Our very own haggling can bring us to a place of repenting of our ways. So when the Israelites repented and said "You're our One and Only," God knew that in their hearts, at that moment, that's what they really wanted.

~ ~ ~

So I'm pondering all of this while in the Bible I read about Ahab ... as in Ahab and Jezabel ... as in ...

Ahab son of Omri did more evil in the eyes of the LORD than any of those before him. He not only considered it trivial to commit the sins of Jeroboam son of Nebat, but he also married Jezebel daughter of Ethbaal king of the Sidonians, and began to serve Baal and worship him. (I Kings 16:30-31)

and the really short version is that God and Elijah went to war with Ahab and Jezebel. I'm sure you're familiar with the scene where Elijah told Ahab that if he wanted the drought and famine to end (after 3 yrs) that he needed to gather up all of Baal's priests for a great big sacrifice event. If Baal showed up first with the fire, then he won. If God showed up first with the fire, Baal and the priests lost. So Ahab took Elijah up on the deal.

They gathered up allllll the people. They set up an alter and then Elijah stood around mocking the priests of Baal while they went heavy into self-mutilation trying to get their Baal to show up and rescue them. But, of course, he doesn't. So Elijah's turn comes and he has God's alter drowned in water. But! Poof! Up went the alter and the sacrifice in a ball of fire.

So, of course, the people fell down on their faces and for another moment in time God was their true God ... oh and they killed all the Baal priests.

Ahab went back and whined to Jezebel and licked his wounds. And Ahab was just not a happy camper ... maybe because if Momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy. Those Baal priests seem to have been brought in by Jezebel.

But get this! Read on. God keeps trying to convince Ahab to pay attention to Him. God even gives him a big battle victory. But Ahab is far more interested in getting Jezebel to rescue him. You'll just have to read about it in I Kings 17 - 21. So finally, God sends Elijah to Ahab with this message:

17 Then the word of the LORD came to Elijah the Tishbite: 18 "Go down to meet Ahab king of Israel, who rules in Samaria. He is now in Naboth's vineyard, where he has gone to take possession of it. 19 Say to him, 'This is what the LORD says: Have you not murdered a man and seized his property?' Then say to him, 'This is what the LORD says: In the place where dogs licked up Naboth's blood, dogs will lick up your blood—yes, yours!' "

20 Ahab said to Elijah, "So you have found me, my enemy!"
"I have found you," he answered, "because you have sold yourself to do evil in the eyes of the LORD. 21 'I am going to bring disaster on you. I will consume your descendants and cut off from Ahab every last male in Israel—slave or free. 22 I will make your house like that of Jeroboam son of Nebat and that of Baasha son of Ahijah, because you have provoked me to anger and have caused Israel to sin.'

23 "And also concerning Jezebel the LORD says: 'Dogs will devour Jezebel by the wall of Jezreel.'

24 "Dogs will eat those belonging to Ahab who die in the city, and the birds of the air will feed on those who die in the country."

25 (There was never a man like Ahab, who sold himself to do evil in the eyes of the LORD, urged on by Jezebel his wife. 26 He behaved in the vilest manner by going after idols, like the Amorites the LORD drove out before Israel.) I Kings 21:17-26

Sounds pretty definite!
Right?

Don't count on it.
Watch this!

27 When Ahab heard these words, he tore his clothes, put on sackcloth and fasted. He lay in sackcloth and went around meekly.

28 Then the word of the LORD came to Elijah the Tishbite: 29 "Have you noticed how Ahab has humbled himself before me? Because he has humbled himself, I will not bring this disaster in his day, but I will bring it on his house in the days of his son." I Kings 21:27-29

Wait!
What?!

Yeah.

So the short of it is that Ahab got three more years but eventually the blood and dogs do show up.

So you know ...

That matched up with what Dan was saying about not being able to negotiate with God without changing aka repenting.

~ ~ ~

But
of Course

You know I had to go back and re-read about Samuel and Saul.

Why did Samuel tell Saul ...

"... He who is the Glory of Israel does not lie or change His mind; for He is not a man, that He should change His mind." I Samuel 15:29

I realized that possibly it's because Saul never humbled himself. He refused to enter into negotiation with God. He negotiated with Samuel but not God.

Watch

Samuel to Saul: (I Samuel 15 )

This is what the LORD Almighty says: 'I will punish the Amalekites for what they did to Israel when they waylaid them as they came up from Egypt. 3 Now go, attack the Amalekites and totally destroy everything that belongs to them. Do not spare them; put to death men and women, children and infants, cattle and sheep, camels and donkeys.'

What Samuel does is this here ...

7 Then Saul attacked the Amalekites all the way from Havilah to Shur, to the east of Egypt. 8 He took Agag king of the Amalekites alive, and all his people he totally destroyed with the sword. 9 But Saul and the army spared Agag and the best of the sheep and cattle, the fat calves and lambs—everything that was good.

It continues ...

These they were unwilling to destroy completely, but everything that was despised and weak they totally destroyed.

So God said to Samuel ...

11 "I am grieved that I have made Saul king, because he has turned away from me and has not carried out my instructions." Samuel was troubled, and he cried out to the LORD all that night.

Evidently it does no good to have someone who intercedes for you if you're heart isn't repenting ... because ...

12 Early in the morning Samuel got up and went to meet Saul, but he was told, "Saul has gone to Carmel. There he has set up a monument in his own honor and has turned and gone on down to Gilgal."

13 When Samuel reached him, Saul said, "The LORD bless you! I have carried out the LORD's instructions."

14 But Samuel said, "What then is this bleating of sheep in my ears? What is this lowing of cattle that I hear?"

15 Saul answered, "The soldiers brought them from the Amalekites; they spared the best of the sheep and cattle to sacrifice to the LORD your God, but we totally destroyed the rest."

"Woah!" says Samuel!
Ok technically he said ...

16 "Stop!" Samuel said to Saul. "Let me tell you what the LORD said to me last night."
"Tell me," Saul replied.

17 Samuel said, "Although you were once small in your own eyes, did you not become the head of the tribes of Israel? The LORD anointed you king over Israel. 18 And He sent you on a mission, saying, 'Go and completely destroy those wicked people, the Amalekites; make war on them until you have wiped them out.' 19 Why did you not obey the LORD ? Why did you pounce on the plunder and do evil in the eyes of the LORD ?"

So Saul tried again to justify himself (and blame others).

20 "But I did obey the LORD," Saul said. "I went on the mission the LORD assigned me. I completely destroyed the Amalekites and brought back Agag their king. 21 The soldiers took sheep and cattle from the plunder, the best of what was devoted to God, in order to sacrifice them to the LORD your God at Gilgal."

But Samuel will hear none of it.

22 But Samuel replied:
"Does the LORD delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices
as much as in obeying the voice of the LORD ?
To obey is better than sacrifice,
and to heed is better than the fat of rams.

23 For rebellion is like the sin of divination,
and arrogance like the evil of idolatry.
Because you have rejected the word of the LORD,
He has rejected you as king."

Saul lied to Samuel. He lied to God. Then the story goes on ... and eventually Saul basically said, "Ok. Fine. I was wrong. I sinned. Just please follow through with the rituals so that I am not humiliated before Israel."

34 Then Samuel left for Ramah, but Saul went up to his home in Gibeah of Saul. 35 Until the day Samuel died, he did not go to see Saul again, though Samuel mourned for him. And the LORD was grieved that He had made Saul king over Israel.

God said ... (I Samuel 16 )

1... "How long will you mourn for Saul, since I have rejected him as king over Israel? Fill your horn with oil and be on your way; I am sending you to Jesse of Bethlehem. I have chosen one of his sons to be king."

And so Samuel worked out a plan with God so that he could accomplish this without being killed by Saul. And when Samuel arrived at Jesse's ...

6 ...Samuel saw Eliab and thought, "Surely the LORD's anointed stands here before the LORD."

7 But the LORD said to Samuel, "Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart."

And eventually they got around to David ... who we all know was far from perfect ... but ... all the rest of the kings were measured against David and found lacking (except for Josiah) and even Paul in Acts 13:22 says ...

After removing Saul, He made David their king. He testified concerning him: 'I have found David son of Jesse a man after my own heart; he will do everything I want him to do.'

And then I was left in the quiet ... with questions and amazement ...

I'm sure you can see I'm a little excited about seeing this whole thing a little bit clearer. And while I do feel blessed to understand a little bit more ... Well, you remember me mentioning how it is that looking over "Pondering Point" from a different angle may just leave you in deeper awe of the whole view? Ok so let's follow wordy with some quiet awe ... let's consider the lavish ...

This question is from Dan (with much paraphrasing) ... and me ... How is it that God is patient enough to listen to us whine, complain, haggle, negotiate, beg for a different way ... God being all powerful, all knowing ... why does He tolerate it? -- Just to let us move a little closer to repentance and/or comfort? Or even ... get this ... more communication with Him?

And wasn't it just awesome the way God knew just how to layer His book with Dan's book just for me? Remember? I was reading them both. Then I stopped reading Dan's because I felt overwhelmed. Then I came to this basic question of "Can we or can't we change God's mind?" Then I suddenly felt prompted to finish Dan's book. And then I read some more in the Bible and bumped into Ahab. Then it was all too much and I had to re-read Samuel ... but this time it was with a different view. I just felt so in awe that God took notice of the timing that I needed.

And well one more for the road ... Literally. You remember I told you about how people up here are always picking Billy up to take him to the train station or take him home? Ok, well, on Presidents' Day morning, Billy was walking along and a lady stopped. She convinced him that the trains were running on the holiday schedule -- 10 min early with a 2 hr wait for the next train! She took him to the train station. He barely made it. Her husband, R., was already there.

That night R and Billy came home on the same train. That night the both of them had to walk home. That night R invited Billy to church. That night R committed to picking us up and taking us because it's a church that we already knew we'd probably enjoy (much longer story left out right here).

And so ... we went ... and ... well ... so ... I've been reading all this Old Testament stuff ... and ... I've been wishing that I could do the Beth Moore study on the Patriarchs. ... And ... So ... just for me ... they scheduled some time ago ... to start the Beth Moore study on the Patriarchs next week and they handed me my very own workbook last Sunday! How did they know?

The Sleeping with Bread meme is propagated by Mary of Life, the Universe and Everything. It gives us a chance to pause and consider God's blessings and a chance to evaluate what is giving us pause or grief.

I didn't get to do a Sleeping with Bread post last Monday and I'm running late to stay within the Thursday 13 window. So, what with creative desperation being the mother of mush-up's, here we go.

Thirteen Observations from Attempting to Read the Bible in 90 Days.

Blessings

1) Ruth's devotion to her mother-in-law -- moreover the kind of lady Naomi had to be in order for both of her daughter-in-law's to resist leaving her -- but Ruth was the more determined of the two.

But Ruth replied, "Don't urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried. May the LORD deal with me, be it ever so severely, if anything but death separates you and me." (Ruth 1:16)

2) Boaz's care for Ruth. People tend to read the book of Ruth and only see Ruth's devotion to Naomi. But I'm telling you ... The next time you read Ruth notice that that Boaz was one gentleman who knew how to make a lady feel cared for and protected. Many first dates don't go as well as their first meeting. I do not think the idea suddenly leapt into his heart to marry Ruth because she came to him and presented the idea. Nope his actions the very next morning indicate to me that he had been pondering his options.

3) Hannah's prayer for a child. She did not say "O Lord, I'm wonderful with so much to give to a child. Please let me create a child in my own image to play with and shape and enjoy." Instead she simply proclaimed her misery, asked for a blessing, and promised the Lord what was already His -- since the first son was to be consecrated to God. (Exodus 13:2). Hanna did go much further, though, by sending Samuel to live and work with the priest Eli.

"O LORD Almighty, if you will only look upon your servant's misery and remember me, and not forget your servant but give her a son, then I will give him to the LORD for all the days of his life, and no razor will ever be used on his head."

Before Hanna went to pray though there was a shift in her actions. Hannah redirected her emotional energy. She stopped pouring it out before her rival and instead poured it out before God.

4)Extra blessings for Hanna. Have you ever noticed ... have you ever asked for the opportunity to be blessed in such a way as to be able to make a sacrifice -- for God &/or another person? Isn't it amazing what happens when we get that blessing and we get to make that sacrifice? Well, yeah, it feels great to get to help someone ... but ... do you notice that God seems to enjoy throwing in some extra blessings on a pretty regular basis?

Samuel was ministering before the LORD -- a boy wearing a linen ephod. Each year his mother made him a little robe and took it to him when she went up with her husband to offer the annual sacrifice. Eli would bless Elkanah and his wife, saying, "May the LORD give you children by this woman to take the place of the one she prayed for and gave to the LORD." Then they would go home. And the LORD was gracious to Hannah; she conceived and gave birth to three sons and two daughters. Meanwhile, the boy Samuel grew up in the presence of the LORD. (I Samuel 2:18-21)

5) Samuel learning to listen to God and proof that parents (and others raising children) do not have to be perfect all of the time ... IF they can teach their children to listen when God speaks. ((I Samuel 3:9)

6) David's declaration to Goliath. There are times ya gotta know when to show up for the fight ... and you need to know when it's not really going to be your victory.

"You come against me with sword and spear and javelin, but I come against you in the name of the LORD Almighty, ... for the battle is the LORD's, and he will give all of you into our hands." ((I Samuel 17:45-47)

7) David's diligent seeking of God's will. Over and over David consulted with God about whether or not to go into battle.

8) An unexpected Psalm in the midst of Samuel. 2 Samuel 22 (I thought they were only in Psalms)

9) The fact that even though Moses and David messed it up big time, their sins do not keep them from the presence of God ... as soon as they repent, God continues to show up in their lives ... carrying them through the consequences of their sins ... and ... then welcomes them into eternity and posterity with blessings. I'll have to share more of this with you later.

Disconcerting

10) That even though Samuel had been serving with Eli, Eli hadn't taught Samuel about listening for God.

Now Samuel did not yet know the LORD : The word of the LORD had not yet been revealed to him. (I Samuel 3:7)

How can this be? How could Samuel serve through all the rituals and not know? And, yet, how many of us do the same thing?

11) Even though Samuel watched Eli lose blessings and gain curses because of his son's behavior, Samuel's sons behaved in the same way -- to the point that the people even sited their dishonest ways as a reason for a king.

It surprises me but this sort of failure with the kids seems to be the norm rather than the exception. Very disconcerting.

12) It seems David eventually stopped consulting God about every battle. I wasn't paying strict attention to this when I read it through ... but ... it seems that David handed the warring over to Joab ... along with some dirty work 2 Samuel 11. I don't remember exactly how the story ends ... I just finished the psalm in 2 Samuel 22 ... but I suspect betrayal lurking in the heart of Joab -- if not of David, himself, then some sort of trouble with Solomon. We will see.

13) Letting things stand as a mystery ... like ... why did the men marry so many wives (what were they thinking!?) ... and why did Samuel say "God doesn't change his mind" when He did in fact change His mind several times regarding, oh, say, starting the whole project over with just Moses. And all this constant warring -- at annihilation level. This list doesn't even begin to touch the mystery list ... most especially the list of items under the heading of "people, teachers, preachers say ... but the Bible says ..."

But I can't handle the geography being a mystery. I've got to locate some maps that have these old places labeled!


The Sleeping with Bread meme is propagated by Mary of Life, the Universe and Everything. It gives us a chance to pause and consider God's blessings and a chance to evaluate what is giving us pause or grief.

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Blessings:

Well ... I'm still wayyy behind--100 pages now. I was feeling rather grumpy about it until I realized ... I'm still loving the adventure! And it is an adventure! It is also a 90 day adventure for some ... but I'm blessed so I'm making new rules.

• First rule: Finish.
• Second rule: Read before anything and everything.
• Third rule: Finish even if it takes 180 days.
• Fourth rule: Remember this is for me to know and see more of God. It is not about keeping up with the Joneses (there's descending family joke in that).
• Fifth rule: Keep Lov'n the Adventure!

Do you know it is impossible to mention to anyone that you're reading the Bible cover to cover just "in passing" or "as a matter of fact." I have found myself in many conversations where the other side has automatically jumped to the defensive. I just shrug and say something along the lines of, "You should try reading it for yourself and find out what you discover in there that people aren't really talking about ... for example did you know ... that most of God's chosen leaders were scoundrels who had to repent over and over because they kept straying off the straight and narrow? Oh, Genesis is full of as much or more scandal than the evening news ... and that's just the beginning."

And this weeks humor: Moses waits until the first generation of Israelites has croaked in the desert, then he recounts their history to the "young people" and in it, twice he claims that God isn't going to let him cross over the Jordan river because of God's anger with the group. First in Deuteronomy 3:23-28.

At that time I pleaded with the LORD : "O Sovereign LORD, you have begun to show to your servant your greatness and your strong hand. For what god is there in heaven or on earth who can do the deeds and mighty works you do? Let me go over and see the good land beyond the Jordan -- that fine hill country and Lebanon."

But because of you the LORD was angry with me and would not listen to me. "That is enough," the LORD said. "Do not speak to me anymore about this matter. Go up to the top of Pisgah and look west and north and south and east. Look at the land with your own eyes, since you are not going to cross this Jordan. But commission Joshua, and encourage and strengthen him, for he will lead this people across and will cause them to inherit the land that you will see."

But over and over what is recorded as God's reason is this:

"Because you (Moses) did not trust in me enough to honor me as holy in the sight of the Israelites, you will not bring this community into the land I give them." (Numbers 20:12)

It was always all about Moses and Arron and the fact that they did not speak as they were told to the rock. I think the give away is this bit right here:

He and Aaron gathered the assembly together in front of the rock and Moses said to them, "Listen, you rebels, must we bring you water out of this rock?" Then Moses raised his arm and struck the rock twice with his staff. Water gushed out ... (Numbers 20:10-11)

But ... See what God really said to do is this:

"Take the staff, and you and your brother Aaron gather the assembly together. Speak to that rock before their eyes and it will pour out its water. ..."

Do you see that little difference? I've always heard the big difference was the reason -- that he struck the rock. But I see it in the words ... a more subtle thing than action (but a more powerful thing) is always in our words. ... God told Moses something to say to the rock ... Moses didn't quote anything at all to the rock from God ... Moses yelled at the people ... and said "... must we bring you water ...?" ... and then he hit the rock. Moses did not speak God's words to the rock (or the people). And it might could even be said that Moses claimed to have the ability himself to bring forth the water.

I think that is why ... over and over and to the very end God says:

This is because both of you broke faith with me in the presence of the Israelites at the waters of Meribah Kadesh in the Desert of Zin and because you did not uphold my holiness among the Israelites. (Deuteronomy 32:5)

Anyway ... I was surprised to find that Moses tried to rewrite history a bit on this.

Ok and one last thing ... We'll call this my point of frustration ... Israel is very melodramatic. Over and over they say "If we'd just died in Egypt..." or "If we'd just died with our brothers in the desert..." or some such variation. It made me wonder what phrases I use to whine about discontentment. Do I sound just as insane?

~ The Sleeping with Bread meme is propagated by Mary of Life, the Universe and Everything. ~

Blessings
A day late and at least 500 words shorter than usual.

You know I don't feel like I necessarily have fresh thoughts regarding Biblical studies. I've read so much and heard so much that my thoughts are very often thoughts that I've just ... you know ... had stored in my head. What I love, though, is when those ideas that belong to others suddenly step out in my own mind -- in my own words -- because of my own studies. That's when it clicks and I say "Ah-ha! I get it!"

I've been musing: "Why was it that over and over Moses was able to basically talk God out of wiping out the whole nation and starting over with just Moses?" I'd have to read it all again taking notes ... but I don't recall one time God said he was fed up with his own plan. He was just ready to scrap it all and start over with a fresh batch of clay. And you know He did get started on wiping out the nation multiple times over the idolatry, grumbling, and other egotistical stunts but Moses always intervened. And you know what else ... have you ever noticed that God didn't talk through/to the priests very much?

And so I started to wonder ... why is it that God isn't wiping out us, his adopted children ... most especially in the US? Well, yes, I know a case can be made for plagues and the like ... but He hasn't just up and scorched us off the face of the earth (yet). And I had two thoughts one on top of the other BAM ...

First, "They had Moses always standing in the gap for them. Who stands in the gap for us?"
Second, "OH! Jesus!"

They were two thoughts. It was not one run-on thought. I'd like to claim that I hadn't forgotten such a fundamental truth ... but I had. And I feel it was a very distinct blessing that the reminder came through loud and clear and immediately!

Ok funny thought. Have you ever considered that maybe the reason all those rules and regs in Exodus, Leviticus, and Numbers feel so disjointed and repetitive is because there's no dates in there to indicate when one "blog entry" stops and another starts. And imagine that this was your blog and you're keeping up with all the rules and regs you're teaching your kids:

"Today I told the kids ... again ... "

Yeah ... you'd sound a little repetitive and disjointed and possibly ... if you were totally honest ... you'd consider wiping the kids out and MAYbe starting over -- MAYBE! At least God always had the strength to want to hope that He could get the next batch of clay to behave.

Frustrations

Well I thought it might be a blessing to get caught up by listening to the audio version. Hmmm but it didn't work out so well. I don't remember a blessed thing that I listened to. So then I tried listening while I read ... NO way! So ... I'm still way behind. I'm just going to make a new reading plan that will maybe get me caught up in about 2 or 3 weeks. Maybe it will give someone else hope.

The Sleeping with Bread meme is propagated by Mary of Life, the Universe and Everything. Yesterday she and her husband celebrated their Nineteenth wedding anniversary. Be sure to pop over and tell her "congrats!"

Blessings:

I keep bumping into the idea that God actually values the beginnings and endings of our days ... and He seems to expect us to value the passing of our days by setting up times and ways for us to take time out and honor him ... in a routinely manner.

At first, I saw it in the very defined "evening and morning was the first day" type phrases. Then as He's started to set up the rules and regs for the Israelites, I've bumped into it over and over. There were things that go with the day, things that go with certain days of the week, and things that go with certain seasons.

Yes there are pre-established thoughts in my head that are making me keenly aware of this about God. We'll talk about it some time. In the mean time, I am considering what I could be doing to mark the comings and goings of my day ... in order to have some mood markers ... markers that order my days and set the mood.

The first thing I decided to do was to take my sabbath day of no work. So yesterday I tried really hard to stay away from the computer. It was kind of challenging to only log in and approve comments once in the morning and once in the evening. I started a new design for a few pages on Saturday and I really wanted to keep fiddling with it.

I am behind in my reading so yesterday I went out and sat in a coffee shop (and, yes, of course, I have stories to tell about yet another coffee shop character ... but that's also another day ... maybe even a series of days, or weeks ... uh anyway...). And I was reading about the setting up of the tabernacle.

One of the things that Aaron (the priest) was to do is burn incense in the morning and in the evening while tending to the candles. And it put me to remembering a very nice stay I had with some friends -- specifically, my new daughter-in-law's parents. Her mom had an evening mood setting ritual. Quiet music. Candles all over the living area. And the indoor lights dimmed to match the twilight outside.

So, yesterday, I came home, lit some candles ... and then thought about "If evening is really the beginning, what do I usually do in the mornings?" And so I ... started beans to soak for (tonight's) supper, made Billy's lunch for work, washed the dishes, ironed Billy's shirt. Washed and dried a load of laundry ... but it's still waiting for the folding.

Confession ... it was easy to make the transition because I didn't have to stop and think about Billy because he was out working on a friend's car. (Pray they get that thing running again tomorrow night ... something about headers, valves, and timing belts.) And I hadn't already worn myself out during the day. But let me tell you ... I have super enjoyed my morning! Very few dishes to wash, guilt free writing, guilt free coffee musings!

This morning I got up and lit the candles again. They smell good and it's a deary day. But I really want to consider the whole burning incense thing because it starts and finishes by itself.

Oh! The really funny thing I noticed ... yeah ... well when you go back and read about the Pharaoh's magicians duplicating the plagues ... yeah ... they could duplicate them ... so that they had more frogs ... more bloody river water, etc. ... but ... Pharaoh always had to call Moses in to get the plagues lifted.

It made me wonder ... Pharaoh always minimized the plagues ... "Hey, my guys can do it, too. So what's the big deal?" I'm just think'n there's a moral in there for us somewhere ... something about "he'll just have to hit bottom before he starts looking for a way out" feels like a somewhat similar echo.

Frustrations:

I'm way behind in my reading ... I started trying to read in the evenings ... huge mistake ... either Billy wanted my attention or the Bible was hitting me in the face ... you just can't relax your grip when reading in bed. So, now to figure out how to get caught up. Step one: read during the day. Hmm maybe it should be part of my coffee musings time ... hmmmmm.

Also, in considering my inspiration for starting these new ways of looking at things and routines, it's made me rather aware that I have incorporated some new principles but I am not so much closer to incorporating the principle Creator ... hmmmm.

Mary-LUE has a Meme called "Sleeping with Bread". I've struggled with it for two reasons: 1) It's on Monday. 2) I couldn't understand part of it (the real reason).

You can read the details but the short of it is that it's an opportunity to review what brought you blessing and what caused you pain or struggle during the week before. I couldn't understand why one would want to review what had been so hard about the prior week.

Finally, (things have to live in my head a while before they make good connections) I got it! If we don't take time to review what is causing us grief, we don't know how to adjust our lives accordingly. We end up fighting what we should be accepting and (more often, I think) we end up accepting what we should be fighting ... well at least making new arrangements for.

So, as some of you know, I am reading the Bible through in 90 days with a group that I hooked up with on the Internet.

Today I'm going to share some of the blessings of accomplishing this marathon. And then I'm going to tell you about some of the down sides.

Some of the edifications and blessings

Well ... reading the Bible in a glob has been a bit humorous. I mean that in the most respectful way. But really have you ever read the book of Genesis in four days? It get's pretty funny in some parts when you're just running your eyes over the terrain and you keep seeing these same issues popping up over and over ... just like ... you know ... modern day today.

Mostly, I ended up being amazed by God's patience and also ...A question came up and I began to ponder something about those ever lying patriarchs.

One good thing about reading the whole thing in one clump is that when a meandering question pops into my head, I have a fighting chance of remembering something that I read in the previous chapters that will provide me with a fairly instantaneous "OH yeah!" moment ... or the question will linger in my head long enough for the next few chapters to provide an "OH I See" moment.

For example ... Genesis 6:3

Then the Lord said, "My Spirit will not contend with man forever, for he is mortal, his days will be a hundred and twenty years.

I don't know if parents today have these moments but when I was raising my children, I'd have moments when I'd say to myself, "Wait! Why am I putting up with this? I am the parent. They are merely children!" And to them I would say, "ENOugh ... go to bed. NOW." It just sort of felt like, on a much grander scale, God had one of those moments.

But as I pondered this bit of humor through the day, I began to wonder, did I miss something? I didn't remember a lot of contending going on ... 2 chapters to make earth and man ... 1 chapter for man to mess it up ... 8 more verses and there's a murder ... then there's a whole bunch of really old men begetting a whole bunch of kids. I didn't remember a whole bunch of tedious contending.

Two bits of verses came together in my mind. One was Gen 4:6-7

The the Lord said to Cain, "Why are you angry? Why is your face downcast? If you will do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you but you must master it.

The other was Gen. 6:5:

The Lord saw how great man's wickedness on the earth had become, and that every inclination of the thoughts of his heart were only evil all the time.

So evidently God kept waiting for them to "do what is right" and they only had "only evil all the time" in the thoughts of their heart ... which says to me these were those deep seated thoughts of the determined sort.

Can you imagine waiting 950 years for the kids around you to get it right? Ugg ... I didn't have enough patience to wait 95 minutes. I'm not sure I give my man 95 seconds most of the time.

And then there's this. The bloom'n patriarchs that were suppose to be the chosen leaders, etc -- They were a lying bunch of scalawags! All The Time! So the question was brought up in our reading group: "Since they lied all the time, why were they so materially blessed ... often as a direct result of a lie."

Something kept pulling at the back edges of my mind ... I kept thinking "I know I've heard or read a lesson on this." Well, the exact lesson and the teacher never came to mind. A group photo type image came to mind of several excellent teachers but one lesson thread tied to one specific teacher never did. Eventually, all their lessons combined together to helped me see things fresh again for myself.

You know in Gen 27 when Jacob plays out his treachery of tricking his dad and stealing his brother's blessing ... all according to Rebekah's plan? Well things get kind of out of control and Esau starts planning to kill Jacob. In verses 42-45 Rebekah tells Jacob to get his body outta site and run to her brother because "Why should I lose both of you in one day?" In that sentence, I started to feel sorry for these people.

If you go backwards and forward from that point, you will see it ... the grief that their lies caused to themselves and each other ... it is so intense and so multi-layered ... and it just seems to snowball with each generation. So, while they had material blessings, they had no peace ... not even in the inner-circle of their families.

At the same time ... several times you will find that their belief in God's promises and their obedience usually was fairly on target when God came and dealt with them on a personal basis â€" And He was pleased with this. I suspect that had something to do with their material blessings. But also God is no slacker. He was busy getting ready to physically provide for a whole bunch of people.

Ok one more thing that was a blessing to me. I noticed this: God gave each of the patriarchs more than the 120 years and each one got to see some sort of easing of the knots that their lies had caused. I think God was gracious in this ... that they got to see some good still come from their lives and their children's lives ... maybe because, as best I recall, they came to places of deep grief over the lies they had told. You really should read the whole story in just a few days. It's better than any novel written today.

To me their blessing of God's leniency in allowing them enough days to see something good restored to their families matches with one of the threads I know runs through the Bible. David to God ... Psalms 51:16-17

"You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it;
you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings.

The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;
a broken and contrite heart,
O God, you will not despise.

The down side to reading so much so quickly?

I don't get to diddle around with it and question God at every turn. So much of it I just have to let go of (at least for the moment) and say "Alright it is as Dr. Criswell always said: 'It is the right of deity to not explain every last detail (to us mere mortals). We simply are not allowed to know everything right now.'"

Also, I'm realizing that I need to read the Bible through in about 90 days 4 or 5 times before I ever consider taking time to dissect the scripture. I mean I feel like this dissection thing ... of scattering bits and pieces of the Bible across years and churches and teachers ... is exactly the reason I keep finding myself going "HEY wait! What do you mean Isaac didn't croak right away after he gave the blessing to Jacob ... he was suppose to be dieing" ... yet ... he didn't ... not until Jacob came back and patched things up with Esau, and after Jacob diddled around in the desert ... oh yeah and then he got around to going back and patching things up with his dad, Isaac ... YEAH ... and then the ancient old Isaac still hung in there a few more years.

... And did you know that Joseph didn't just give the grain to the Egyptians during the famine? Nope ... he charged them money ... and then ... when their money was gone ... he took their land for the Pharaoh ... and then when their land was gone ... they all became servants to the Pharaoh ... Now Tell ME ... with a record like that ... how does a Pharaoh then rise up a few generations later that didn't know of Joseph?! Oh yeah ... it happened ... but that's next week ... and there's something really funny to tell you next week.