Excuse me. I just had to step away and decide ! again ! the directions I am taking my writings and my web site. I was already adrift in meditations on this subject when I encountered Jesse aka WhiteCrow Walking.

Stories. The reoccurring theme ...

Yes, I like exploring and researching ideas ... but until I can tell them like a story, I am not content.

But, Stories!

Stories that tell about the knots in life ... knot upon knot that seem to be weaving in confusion from love to frustration to joy to pain to healing to distraction to loss to nerve-wracking suspense to love ... eventually all these knots form beautiful tatted lace designs -- rotating in circles of motifs -- circles of people. Sigh ... these are the stories that make my heart race.

I have lived quite a few of these stories. I have observed people with these stories. I have observed people who have spent their lives doing their very best to avoid a life containing these stories. I feel sorry for them.

Ah stories ... the running theme ...

September is also the sound of November approaching. Last year wove three things together for me in a very painful knot. NaNoWriMo. Thanksgiving. The loss of my nephew, Calvin. I was struggling with myself ... coming up with really "valid" reasons to avoid the NaNoWriMo.

I have essays that need to be written.

I have plans for my web site that would have to slow down.

Never mind that I had received "poof" out-of-the-blue a fantastic idea to write about and that I knew I could fill my blog and my web site with the pain, agony, joy and results of the experience!

Still I countered with: I don't really write fiction. (Of course, to get to write about much of my life I'd have to write fiction to protect the guilty and avoid lawsuits.).

But in all of this, I encountered Jesse and then Dan Allender's writings always seem to show up in my life when I need them most. When we were in the process of moving to NY, I ran across one of his essays: "Remembering That We Forget." I snagged up into my Firefox Scrapbook. So, finally, when I needed a test subject for Opera to read to me, I chose his essay. Hmmm

Somewhere along the way I had to admit. My reason for avoiding NaNoWriMo was really about trying to avoid thinking about our loss. I had to admit that I was thinking that avoiding NaNoWriMo would allow me to forget why I didn't finish NaNoWriMo last year. Which, of course, is just WACK!

There is no avoiding the remembering. And Calvin would not be pleased to find me making excuses ...

So. There you have it. Get prepared. Stories. Still. And Again!